Wednesday, October 21, 2015

The Return?

Hi Guys! Wow, has it been a while since I've been on Blogger!

I honestly meant for this to be a short break from blogging that would only last during the Summer, but that obviously didn't happen as we are now well into Fall.  As much as I love to write and engage with other bloggers, though, it has been very tough for me to come back to blogging. I'm sure most bloggers at some point feel this way, like blogging has become more of a burden than an enjoyable hobby.

This little break really made me realize how much of a strain my blog had become for me. It was all "gotta catch up on the latest posts," and "gotta put up new content." It was more of a chore than anything. Now that I've had time to step back and enjoy life without my blog, and I have been able to really assess my feelings about it.

For me, I feel that I am no longer able to express myself through my blog, and I'm not sure the direction I want to take now. In general I feel that fashion and beauty blogs are a little superficial. No offense to any of my fellow bloggers out there; I am an avid reader of a few fashion and beauty blogs and find their posts very enjoyable and informative. However, the majority of the fashion blogs I follow I never even visit simply because their posts are entirely high fashion/designer oriented. I don't think there is anything wrong with that at all, but for me, it is not at all something I'm interested in, and, for my tastes at least, there is no substance to such posts. My opinion holds true for most beauty blogs out there as well.

Whenever I tried to do fashion or beauty product posts, it always felt so forced and fake for me. I don't mind sharing a few products or outfits that I really like and would recommend using, but to consistently do this is a strain to me.

I think part of my problem is that I try to pigeonhole myself into a certain "niche." I know there is a lot of advice out there on "creating your personal brand" and "finding your niche," but this all seems more like a hindrance to my blog. This advice is great if you use your blog as a way to advertise your business, or if you want to attract sponsors. I started my blog as a way to continue writing after college and to keep myself preoccupied while I was looking for a job. Of course, when I was jobless I thought about trying to create revenue with my blog. Ultimately, my blog is a personal blog, where I want to share my personal thoughts, ideas and interests, regardless of how all over the place they may be.

Lately, my main pastime has been my dolls. I joined BFC (Barbie Collectors Fan club) this year and have been able to find and connect with a great community of collectors on Flickr. I've also found several blogs devoted to dolls that I have began following. My dolls have always been a big part of my life since I was four years old. They've helped me through some distressing situations during my childhood, and have become the only creative medium where I can unapologetically express myself. But as I got older, I've always felt a little weird telling people that I still play with dolls. However, being exposed to other adults who have the same passion has actually made me more open about my collecting. Seeing what other people do with their dolls was one of the things that led me to publicly share my doll pictures on Flickr (which you can check out by clicking the "See My Photos" button in the sidebar).

Regarding this blog, I want it to be my one and only blog, but as I mentioned, I'm not sure what direction I want to take with it. Right now, I use Flickr to post my doll pictures, and this totally works for my needs. I have been toying (no pun intended) with the idea of creating doll stories since I basically do this anyway when I play with my dolls. If I do ever go this route, it will be in the future, and not anytime soon (I need to get over my fear of rejection/criticism before I start posting any stories for the world to see). Since the majority of my time and resources go to my dolls, I would love to post some doll related things on my blog, but I don't want my blog to only be about my dolls. I also don't want to have to deal with posting the same content here and on Flickr, so I want to avoid strictly photo only posts on my blog. That being said, new content is on hold until I can figure things out.

Sorry if this post turned into a rambling mass of text, but I wanted to make you, my readers, aware of what's been going on and why I haven't been posting. As I've mentioned before, I have a serious problem with people dropping off the face of the blogsphere without a word. I believe if you are busy, then say so. If you are quitting, then say so. Don't just leave people hanging and wasting their time checking for new content that will likely never come. Also, I hate being fake. I do a lot of keeping my thoughts and opinions to myself so as not to rock the boat as it is anyway, but I don't want to have to do this on my own blog. I want to let everyone know how I feel my blog should be going forward so it can be more true to me.